THIS is the job offer from hell!
Sir Alan, pictured beside a picture of Ed Balls, says the job is not political
Five series of that entertaining TV stuff, donating your ‘fee’ (or was that just for that ad – the BBC are not known for paying too much unless you are Jonathan Ross) to Great Ormond Street, and the winner gets to be – Gordon Brown’s monkey – for a maximum of 11 months.
The winner gets to choose what to do: continue to be a highly entertaining quiz show host that people love watching on the telly, OR, you get to bounce around the country talking to bankers doing some Dragons’ Den style bank lending thing that no one takes seriously but you do get to call yourself Lordallun.
I would far rather you continued on the Apprentice.
Otherwise you are being asked to do some ridiculous PR crap just for the sake of your enobblement and recognition as a national treasure. You already are. You have achieved great things. You are a role model. If you do that govt thing you risk becoming a laughing stock.
If, in an alternative world, you were offered the option of being a Lord in 12 month’s time without having to humiliate yourself, would it make the choice easier? David, Nick, have a word.